Feedback & Requests 2
Posted 08 June 2008
A long-time correspondent wrote the following in a message he sent a month ago:
My favourite pictures are still the ones in the Working Girl entry where you're wearing the leather opera gloves with the black skirt and strappy shoes. I think I like these so much because you said you wore this in public. I like to imagine what it must have been like to see you in the hotel bar you went to when you were wearing those gloves. You look so sexy and elegant. Is there a chance you could show more pictures from that video? Also you said in the Puss in Boots entry that you would show pictures of your special silver jewellery at some point and you mentioned it again in Lights Camera Action Part 2. My wife doesn't believe you really have any and I'd like to prove her wrong. Can you show a picture sometime?
I'm a bit sceptical of the 'wife doesn't believe you' bit, but that reader certainly knew how to make me respond to a challenge. Although I don't want to show any more shots from the Working Girl video, that message inspired me to go out for lunch the following week wearing my opera gloves and some of my exotic jewellery, and it was exciting knowing that I was dressing not just for the man I would meet that day but for an admirer who had written to me too.
The guy I had lunch with is actually one of Martin's business customers and it's at this point that I maybe should clarify the distinction between the different men I'm involved with these days. I was going to let this become clear as I acquainted you with the past year's events, but I realise from the mail I've been getting that there's some confusion regarding my lifestyle and many of you have the impression that I have a far greater number of lovers than is actually the case. Mea culpa in that respect, and hopefully this post will put the record straight.
Since I've returned you've heard me talk of my 'slaves' and 'lovers', but these aren't the only men I play games with. A slave of mine is a man who has willingly submitted himself sexually to my will - totally submitted. As far as I'm concerned I own that man much as I would own a dog, and what I require from such an individual is complete acceptance of his sexual inadequacy with an attendant right on my part to abuse, punish, and humiliate him for his failure as a man. Compliance with my instructions and demands must be absolute; there is no debate, no middle ground, no opt-out clause. The slave does what his Mistress demands or he is shown the door; it simply has to be like that or my power instantly disappears.
When I talk of a 'lover' I'm specifically referring to one of the superior males that I now see on a fairly regular basis, both at my home and in public. I currently have seven such men in my life, and four of these (two of whom are brothers) have full penetration rights to my vagina, something I no longer grant easily. Without exception these men are physically impressive, well endowed, and of above-average height. None of them is overwhelmingly good looking like Matt, but they have that extra something that attracts women and they know it.
I have no emotional attachment whatsoever to these lovers and they have none to me. I'm well aware that they regard me as nothing more than a hot slut wife who gets her kicks from making her husband watch her have sex with other men. For such self-centred guys I really am the perfect woman - effectively a free hooker who dresses up for them, likes to be tied up, spanked and whipped, loves taking cock in her mouth, and likes to swallow cum or have it sprayed over her in highly unusual ways. Even better, she has a very attractive friend who likes to join in the fun as well.
It's these men, and these men alone, that my submissives watch me having sex with, either in the flesh or on video. Alison and I get some of our biggest kicks from punishing and humiliating a sub while he is made to watch one of us being serviced by a man who really knows how to make a woman come with his cock (more about this later), and as you can no doubt imagine, the slave is invariably required to do more than just passively observe events.
In addition to these slaves and lovers I'm also presently having some sort of sexual relationship with nine other men, but the thing to bear in mind is that apart from Gerald (see the Living Fantasy post) I only see them very infrequently - in a couple of cases only once a year. Three of them are former clients of mine (and they include the shoe-worshipping Robert and the leather-skirt-loving Charles), one is a family relation on Martin's side, there's a man I met in a bar in London, and then there's Gerald. The final three are business customers of my husband's firm.
These other men that I see don't in any way have to live up to the requirements I demand of a lover. I don't care if the guy's short, fat, ugly or small-dicked, and in fact if I'm truthful about it I actually prefer it if the man is fairly unappealing because the whole point of having sex with these men is to emphasise to my husband what a complete slut his wife is. She is prepared to play around with any man to get her sexual kicks, and even unattractive males can give her more satisfaction than her deficient spouse.
The sort of sex I enjoy with these men differs from that I have with my lovers. In most cases I won't entertain having vaginal sex and I refuse to have unprotected sex even though this sadly means that cum-drinking fun is off limits. Although I play a wide variety of games, in general I will remain fully clothed (save for buttons and zips being undone) and after being comprehensively groped and fondled I like the guy to either watch as I use a sex toy on myself or I get him to make me come with said toy. I'll then pleasure him in some way that appeals to his kink before finally either masturbating him to ejaculation or allowing him to anally fuck me.
These men have no problem whatsoever bringing me to climax and I'll usually have at least two orgasms while I'm with them. However the real kicker for me from these encounters comes later, and there's more to it than just describing to Martin exactly how I accommodated the man that day. Where possible, at some later date I'll arrange for Martin and the guy to be present at some function together (usually an evening dinner) and I get this delicious buzz from sitting at a table with my husband as he has to converse with a man who has sucked his wife's breasts and fucked both her mouth and ass. It's even better if the individual is married and his wife is sitting there as well.
Having sex with Martin's business customers is just perfect for this sort of psychological pressurising of my spouse. Martin already has to treat such men with a certain amount of deference because they are, after all, the lifeblood of his firm. Now however he has to hold a normal business relationship with three of them in the full knowledge that these men are also enjoying the attentions of his prick-loving wife. No matter how much Martin wants to be cuckolded, this sort of humiliation is very hard for him to bear, especially as he knows that I'm prepared to offer such after-sales care to any of his customers who desire it, irrespective of age or looks.
In January 2007's Complete Seductress post I told you that on the previous New Year's Eve I had instructed my husband to arrange by the end of 2007 that I have sex with either one of his customers or one of his employees. This was one of those symbolic cuckolding things that I just love doing and it was thrilling to order Martin to do this in such a matter-of-fact way. As it transpired though Martin never had to take the step of pimping me to others. Once I decided I was going to leave my job I took it into my own hands to court my husband's customers. It was a win-win play for me - I got to do some prick teasing and if it led to more then that was simply a bonus.
Only a small proportion of Martin's customers visit him, often as part of a vacation to London, and it was very easy to slot myself into the whole customer care thing. I simply became a sort of cross between a taxi driver and a tour guide, collecting the guy from the airport (or dropping him off), showing him some sights, and taking him for lunch (when Martin was 'unexpectedly' called away). Driving around in a car with a man sitting next to you in the passenger seat is the easiest cock-tease in the world. A short skirt will always ride up while you're driving, even if you don't want it to, and while your eyes are on the road the guy sitting next to you gets a risk-free ogle of your legs and stocking tops. If that short skirt is made of black leather and you're also wearing five-inch stiletto heels then he's even more interested.
Even though my clothing is always highly suggestive, on no occasion have I ever openly thrown myself at any of these men. I've already given you the reasons for this - I'm not very good at coming on to guys, and men are put off by a woman who gives it to them on a plate. Instead I just play the sexy wife, a woman who clearly enjoys dressing for men and who likes to exhibit herself in public. Martin's customer won't get a come-on from me but he will see the signals that I'm enjoying being watched by other men as we walk about in public or dine together.
You need to consider that for many men it's quite an experience to accompany someone like me in public. I inevitably draw a great deal of attention, and for a short period of his life this man will discover what it's like to have a very desirable woman on his arm (if he hasn't already got one at home). I don't need to sell myself any further - my face, body and clothes do it all for me. Just as used to happen when I was working, a man will almost always find the need to pay some compliment to me, something that inadvertently reveals what he's thinking. It's at that moment that I can make the sort of throwaway aside that has served me so well in the past. It might be about boots or high heels, corsets or stockings, leather or rubber, or even chains and whips - whatever it is I make it clear that I'm very highly sexed and not afraid to talk about it. The ball is then back in the guy's court. He can either back off by changing the subject or he can keep the conversation going and discover more about what I like. As a result I've so far managed to avoid any embarrassment or misunderstanding.
The customer I dressed up for in the pictures below (Stephen) is English but moved to Belgium a few years ago and he now visits the UK roughly four times a year. Last year when I took him out for lunch before taking him back to the airport we had exactly the sort of exchange I talked of above. I had met him a couple of times before and his eyes had been all over me then, so you can perhaps imagine his reaction when he first saw me in my best prick-teasing regalia. Over lunch the subject got on to stockings and suspenders - he said he loved them; I said I loved wearing them - and that was it really. When we got back into the car I asked him if he'd like to see my suspenders and he said yes, he would. I therefore pulled my skirt right up and drove all the way to Heathrow with my garter straps in full view. When we got to the airport I asked him to tighten the suspenders for me and as he did so I suggested that the next time he came over he should maybe get a room for a couple of hours before his flight or stay in London for an extra day. It was all so very simple.
There's not really much to tell about the sex I had with my companion that day. After lunch we went to his hotel room and it went much as I described earlier. We played around for half an hour or so with plenty of stroking, groping, sucking and licking, and then I brought myself to climax with a vibrator as Stephen watched. After that I got on to all fours on the bed and he spent some time reaming my rear with a small, heavily lubed dildo, something I can't get enough of and which perfectly prepares my arse for cock. Rather than being aggressively butt-fucked straight away, I then lay on my side and Stephen gently eased his prick into my rear, giving me a very languid anal screwing which went on for nearly thirty minutes. I'd like to always do this if I could as I find it so sensual and relaxing (I almost fall asleep at times), but I've had too many unfortunate moments where the guy hasn't been able to hold himself and has prematurely ejaculated. That ruins it for me because I don't then get the more powerful and unrestrained ass-drilling which I like to finish off with (and I don't get to taunt Martin about it - it's vital that my husband knows that everything I tell him has actually taken place and so I never lie to him about events). Thankfully Stephen seems to have more self-control and despite him being somewhat plain and overweight, I now very much look forward to my sex sessions with him.
Regrettably I didn't get to talk to Martin while any of this was going on because Stephen doesn't like me to. Out of these occasional men I see, only Gerald is prepared to goad my husband over the phone while he's playing around with me, but three of them are quite happy (in fact they get off on it) for me to talk to Martin as I'm being pleasured. I just love it when I can do this, absolutely love it. In such circumstances I like to have anal sex in one of two ways. The first is to get the guy to sit on a chair and I then lower myself on to his cock, facing away from him. By moving my body in just the right way I can masturbate him with my rear rather than him doing the screwing (I'm now very skilled at this). While I'm holding the phone in one hand I can either finger my pussy with the other or use a toy on myself. The second method is perfect for a man with submissive leanings, and here I'll lie on my back and draw my legs up while the guy anally penetrates me. I wear boots on these occasions, either ones I've been wearing in public, or more exotic ones which I'll bring in a travel bag and change into before we start having sex. I wear my vibrating clit stimulator when I'm having sex like this, and while he sodomizes me I get the guy to pay homage to my boots, talking Martin through every moment of the experience:
"Oh God, Martin, it's just wonderful. Lovely cock, just lovely... probably just an inch too short for me, but beautifully hard. That's it darling, lick the boots. Don't rush, there's no need to hurry. That's it baby, nice and slowly... he's licking my boots, Martin, licking that lovely black leather... oh and that cock... it's just gorgeous..."
"Are you wanking yourself, Martin? Hmm? You'd better be. Make sure you fill those panties of mine, I'll be inspecting them later... good, I'm glad to hear it. He's wearing some of my satin panties, John, and he's going to ejaculate into them as he thinks of you screwing me and licking my boots. Unbelievable isn't it?
"Yes, that's right, my baby, you suck them... suck those lovely cock heels. Oh yes... oh yes... I'm going to come while I'm having my heels sucked, Martin. Do you dream of doing that, hmm? Screwing my arse while sucking my heels? I know you do, but you're never going to... Ah, that's lovely... lovely. He's almost got me. He's going to make me come... hard as you can baby, come on, pump it hard... ah beautiful... beautiful... here it comes... fill the condom for me John, see if you can make it burst... ah yes, yes, yes..."
Talking to one's spouse on the phone while being serviced by another man is, in my opinion, actually more exciting than having him witness the physical act itself. As I'll expand upon elsewhere, when I'm not specifically making one of my cuckolding videos I actually prefer to have Martin listening to me having sex with others rather than actually present. I always imagined that nothing could ever top making my husband watch as I'm penetrated by another guy, but now I get a greater thrill from letting him just hear the sounds and dialogue and leaving the rest to his imagination. Whether this is some sort of throwback to when I was first taken by Matt with Martin on the end of the phone I don't know.
Note that the last paragraph applies specifically to penetrative sex. I will never be able to get enough of making Martin watch while I'm being caressed and fondled by another man (even better when it's more than one). If there are women reading this who are tempted by the cuckolding experience, let me at least urge you to strive to enjoy a moment when you're dressed in your partner's favourite sexy outfit and he physically witnesses you passionately kissing another man while that man caresses your body. It's an unforgettable and incredibly erotic moment, and if you're anything like me you'll keep coming back for more.
So, now you know the situation as it stands now and I'm not sure it's going to change a great deal in terms of numbers from hereon forward. It may seem to you that I have an inordinate number of men in my life, but I want to emphasise to you that the amount of time I spend each day having sex with them is actually quite small. As I said in the Living Fantasy post, on some days I don't see anyone at all, and in the Just Another Day entry I spent roughly three-and-a-quarter hours out of twenty-four having some form of encounter with a guy. That's probably a fair average for most weekdays when I'm seeing men. Many visits to my home are very short - just half an hour or even less where I'll suck a guy and then let him ejaculate over me. I need plenty of men around me for variety and so I can maintain the prostitute lifestyle I always dreamed of having, but if you've got some sort of image of me being endlessly fucked from dawn till dusk then you've got it all wrong.
If you reread my diary posts from the beginning you'll see that this lifestyle of being involved with a large number of men was essentially my ambition right from the outset. I had a brief period when I first started seeing Matt where I thought one extramarital lover might be sufficient, but that didn't last long. After a fairly cautious start in 2006, things snowballed for me last year and I started acquiring new men rapidly. Having now experienced what's it's like to genuinely live the life of a whore wife, I could never go back to my former existence.
However absurd it may sound to you, I regard myself as being far less reckless now than I was eighteen months ago. My life is well organised and I am very sure of where I'm going and the sort of men I want to be involved with. As you know I have never succumbed to the temptations of one-night stands or the sort of indiscriminate sex that is becoming popular in the UK (just Google 'dogging' for an example). Sex for me revolves around stylised dressing up - the clothes, the footwear, the accessories. I think of it as being a highly indulgent, sophisticated game, and although the sexual activities I enjoy may seem extreme, they have at their roots a theatrical, choreographed quality. The fantasy world of ritualised fetish sex is my stage.
Anyway, here are some captures that I took on the day I entertained Martin's customer a few weeks ago. And who knows, if you're in the right business then maybe I'll be dressing up like this for you one day. It doesn't matter how old you are, what you look like, how tall you are, how big your prick is... if you're buying from my husband then you get this if you want it. I'll wear any outfit you've seen so far in Maria's Diary for you, I'll put thigh boots on in public if you can handle it, and I'll strap cocks into me if you ask me to. I'll kiss you like I'm in love with you, and while my tongue is thrusting into your mouth you can put your hand up my skirt, play with my suspenders, and then feel my pussy until my excitement is dripping from your fingers. You can pull up my top, lick my rubber bra and then suck my breasts while I stroke your hair and tell you how much I want your hard prick in my rear. And you'll make me come - you'll witness a woman climax with an intensity you've never seen before.
It's all part of customer service.
These Boots Are Made For Driving
I received the following request from another long-time reader soon after I came back online:
Please please PLEASE can you show some more pictures of you driving your car with your thigh boots on as in the Living Fantasy entry. It's not fair just giving us a flash!
Well, that was the whole idea wasn't it? That's all that many drivers or passers-by see when I'm in my car with my boots on. Just that momentary glimpse... can you be sure you actually saw what you think you saw?
It's very exciting driving around in thigh boots, especially when I haven't got a proper skirt on - just a rubber girdle or microskirt. Even if I'm wearing a normal skirt, I'll often unzip it or even take it off while I'm actually in the car. I once drove over a hundred miles on a motorway [freeway] once whilst buckled into a cock harness with no skirt covering it.
Getting out of a car whilst wearing high-heeled thigh length boots and a short skirt is one of those experiences that an exhibitionist like me lives for, and I'm prepared to drive many miles to a particular location just so I can enjoy those few seconds of parading myself to shocked and leering onlookers. My sports car is quite low, and it's not easy for me get out of it elegantly in high heels (see Just Another Day - Part I where I discuss getting off a low sofa). It inevitably involves lifting my legs up high at some point as I turn my body in the seat and this causes my skirt to ride right up, exposing my stockings and suspenders to anyone who happens to be looking at the time (and I make sure there are plenty of men looking).
I stress once again that you have to be absolutely fearless if you're going to do something like this. How many women in all seriousness go out somewhere driving a car wearing thigh boots? Very, very few, and the boots I wear mark me as either a hooker or a blatant attention-seeker. I don't do it that often because I simply can't trust myself to use common sense any more. I always tell myself beforehand that I need to be sensible and remember that we live in an age of CCTV and camera phones, but I get so turned on while I'm driving that the need to display myself becomes overwhelming. I can pass a building site where I notice numerous guys at work and I'll do a U-turn further down the road and come back. I'll stop on the other side of the street, open my car door and put my legs out, pretending to study a map or take a call on my phone. It only takes seconds for the whistles and catcalls to start and this becomes a cacophony when I actually exit the car and openly pull up my skirt to tighten one of my suspenders before getting back inside and driving away. Then the fantasies start of me masturbating in front of such an audience or being screwed by one of the workmen as the others look on, and this just leaves me desperate to show myself once again.
The captures you see below are absolutely typical of what onlookers see when I get out of my car in my high boots.
Hi Maria, just wondering how the trophy room is coming on? Have you filled it yet?
When I got this message I wondered at first what on earth it was all about, but then I quickly realised that the writer must be referring to my Business Slut post where I described how I would like to have a room dedicated to displaying memorabilia from my sexual exploits, such as the short black skirt that my former business client Gary had 'modified' for me (there's a picture of me wearing the skirt at the start of the Complete Seductress post).
I'm certainly collecting exhibits but I must confess that no such room exists yet and I doubt that one will unless we move house (which we're seriously thinking of doing, probably a year or so from now). That skirt isn't framed in a glass case either, but is sitting in one of my wardrobes along with several other garments which hold special significance for me. Not all of these are soiled, although I think my favourite has to be a pair of lace panties which I wore on a day when I had sex with five different men (not all at the same time I should add). I did this deliberately just so I could have such a cum-stained garment to torment Martin with.
Anyway, here's a shot of the little black skirt that started off my collection. It looks very ragged now after being stored so untidily, but I'm sure once it's properly pressed and mounted in a case it will look much better. Hmm, what am I going to have written on the placard beneath it? It's going to be fun thinking that one up.
In my previous post I said:
"When I first cuckolded Martin I was prepared to take on almost any man as a lover providing that he had a prick larger than my husband's. Now however cock size is a far more important consideration and my lovers need to be above average in this department."
I guess it was inevitable that such a comment would prompt some feedback and I've already had two separate emails asking for the same basic clarification:
What do I regard as an 'average' prick size, and what size do I require for a lover?
I had similar questions when I was posting online last year, especially from readers who wanted to compare how they measured up to both Martin and my boyfriend Matt. I'm sure you appreciate that I have no hard and fast rules on this issue and I think the men I see know for themselves which category they fall into. You know whether you're big, average or small don't you? Come on, you know you do. All the same, I thought it would be interesting to be a little more specific in this post and also expand on some of my thoughts about prick size that I've expressed in the past.
I've already got a fair handle on what statistically constitutes average prick size because I looked for info on it last year. I had started to train my new submissive Peter and although I regarded his cock as small I wondered whether my opinion was being distorted by the fact that Matt's prick is so large, as is that of another man I'd started having sex with. I wanted to be able to tell Peter that he really was small and punish him accordingly. I didn't go much farther than a Wikipedia article on the subject because what it said pretty much confirmed my own views. Here are some relevant extracts:
While results vary across studies, the consensus is that the average human penis is approximately 12.9-15 cm (5.1-5.9 in) in length [...] The typical girth or circumference is approximately 12.3 cm (4.85 in) when fully erect. ... A 2005 study found only 55 per cent of men were satisfied with their penis size, whereas 85 per cent of women said they were 'very satisfied' with the size of their partner's penis, and only six per cent of women rated their partner as smaller than average. ... A study published in BMC Women's Health surveyed women's preferences concerning penis size and concluded that width rather than length is a more important factor of sexual stimulation. ... Similar results were found in a cover story in Psychology Today [...] Generally women cared more about width than men, and less about length. "...the number one reason women preferred a thicker penis was that it was more satisfying during intercourse." It's suggested this is because a wider penis provides more friction to the clitoral area while a longer penis reaches an area less stimulable. The same article comments that there is a strong correlation whereby "Women who rated themselves as more attractive were particularly concerned with larger size." ... Another study, conducted at Groningen University Hospital asked 375 sexually active women (who had recently given birth) the importance of penis size and concluded: "Although clearly in the minority, a nevertheless considerable percentage of the respondents attached substantial importance to the size of the male sexual organ."
It was no surprise to me to read that girth is a more important factor than length for the majority of women. Recall what I said in the Lights, Camera, Action Part II post when I quoted the sorts of things I say to Martin when I make him watch a video of Matt screwing me:
"...Oh yeah, I remember this bit. Look at my face, Martin... he's got me, he's really got me... I look like I'm going to pass out. You know, it's a load of bullshit about cock size being unimportant. I used to think that, but the thing is, when you and I used to have intercourse I was always trying to move so that I could get some action on my clit. But with a prick the size of Matt's, I just have to lie there and let him fuck me. My clit can't escape his cock - it's permanently being massaged by it. And then there's that fabulous feeling of being completely filled on the forward thrusts, with his balls banging against me. Just unreal..."
I subsequently received several emails from women who said that they fully agreed with me. What I found interesting though was that those correspondents who had never been overly keen to cuckold their husband but did so at his coaxing almost unanimously had never anticipated that a larger cock would give them more pleasure. Before any extramarital relationship was initiated they felt quite happy with their spouse's prick size and felt no dissatisfaction with the sex they were having. It was only after they had experienced consistently more powerful orgasms from a better-endowed man that the husband's relative deficiency became apparent.
This doesn't always lead to a happy ending, at least not in those cases that have been revealed to me. The problem from the husband's point of view is that he can suddenly find this new reality very tough to cope with psychologically, even though prior to the cuckolding he may have fantasised about such a reaction from his wife. In many instances the situation is made worse by the changed attitude of the woman. Initially reluctant, she now becomes very keen for more such meetings with her lover, or perhaps the husband will notice that on nights when his wife is going out with her new beau she will take extra care to make herself look desirable and she will be visibly excited as she prepares herself. At the same time, when the couple do have sex as they used to, the wife can find it difficult to hide her lack of enthusiasm for her spouse's performance.
It's probably wrong to draw any great conclusions from such a small sampling of relationships, but my impression is that the marriages which survive without trauma or break-up are those where the husband is able to accept his inferiority and learns to live with the new reality of his wife having sex with another man. Unfortunately not all men are able to be so accommodating, and severe marital strain can develop as a jealous and self-doubting husband tries to reimpose his will on a newly confident wife who will never again be able to regard him with the same sexual respect no matter how much she tries. Prior to cuckolding it's the woman who usually has great doubts and expects to end the infidelity, but afterwards it's more often the husband who wants it to finish, with the wife flatly refusing because she is enjoying herself so much.
In my own case I require more than above-average girth in order to orgasm during vaginal sex - I need the length as well. This has nothing to do with depth of penetration; it's simply a psychological rather than physiological phenomenon. I just can't get turned on by the sight of a short, fat cock, no matter how much stimulus it might be able to impart to my clit (in fact I'd go as far to say that I find the thought of a man with such a prick pumping away vigorously in an attempt to make me climax somewhat repellent). No, I need the real deal I'm afraid - something which at least begins to approach the girth and length of my big rubber dildos, which if I'm honest about it give me at least as much vaginal pleasure these days as any man can.
I've not really answered the original question yet, have I? What constitutes 'average' as far as I'm concerned? The average penis size cited in the the Wikipedia article sounds about right to me, and although I don't hold a tape measure to my lovers' cocks, I have a pretty good idea of their dimensions because I can simply compare them to the dildos I own, both in look and feel. The realistic dildo that I have always used as a 'Matt' substitute is 8.25 inches long and 6.25 inches in girth. I have a smaller one from the same manufacturer and this is 6.75 inches long with a girth of 5.75 inches. I'd say that this is around the minimum size that I now require for a lover, although for someone I'm really attracted to I would probably accept a little less.
As for slaves, I guess I'd likely take on any submissive guy who had less than 5.5 inches, but I much prefer it to be less than that and it's important that the girth is sub-standard too. I want a slave to have a prick that is really only worthy of derision and punishment. You may think that I say things like that just for effect, but I can assure you I'm not kidding. When I see a small prick the urge in me to dominate and whip its owner is extremely powerful, and I get tremendous satisfaction from punishing a man for his sexual inferiority.
But what if a man has a large penis and is submissive? Or a man with a small cock is dominant? Well, first of all I've yet to meet an individual in either category, although no doubt plenty of such men exist. There's certainly no law that says small=sub and large=dom. I suspect though that in the case of a well endowed submissive man I'd simply walk away. I don't think I could properly dominate such an individual because so many of my humiliation techniques are based on emphasising a slave's sexual inadequacy. The only thing that might stay my hand is that I find the idea of putting a large cock into bondage very appealing, and as I write this the idea of beating a strapped-up eight-inch prick with a leather belt is a real turn on for me. As for a small-dicked dominant man... well, I'd really love to meet one because I would shred his self-esteem in about two minutes flat (of course that's assuming I'm actually able to say something coherent to him as I look down at his weenie excuse for a prick and double up with laughter).
If categorising a man's adequacy and stature on such a basis seems rather juvenile and irresponsible to you, then please move on elsewhere and don't read my words any more, because for me prick size is the primary determinant of a man's standing in the sexual hierarchy. I'll accept failings in other attributes to an extent, but not this one. You either measure up or you don't. To screw Maria's pussy and dominate her in front of her husband then you must have a prick that makes her go weak at the knees when she feels it through your trouser material or when she puts it in her mouth. Anything less and you haven't got a prayer of siring me while Martin watches on.
No doubt it doesn't seem fair that a throw of the genetic dice should determine whether you're a winner or a loser in the get-to-fuck-Maria stakes, but that's the reality I'm afraid. Does that make you angry? Are you sitting there resenting the fact that some woman who seems to have a very inflated opinion of her desirability has the audacity to tell you how much of a man you are? Do you feel like rattling off an email telling her that the last thing in the world you'd ever want to do is put your prized manhood in her dildo-stretched pussy? Well, hard luck my friend because you know - deep down you KNOW, don't you - that the men who service my vagina and ejaculate their sperm into it are better than you.
Recall what that Psychology Today survey found: "Women who rated themselves as more attractive were particularly concerned with larger size." Now imagine a room with a dozen hot young girls in it. Gorgeous looking, tall, long legs; revealing miniskirts, skyscraper heels, skimpy bras; all turned on and desperate for prick. And then you walk in with another guy. There's nothing to choose between you in height, looks, physique... except his cock is bigger than yours, and the girls can all see that. So, how many of them would choose you, hmm?
Get used to it. They really are better than you.
Following on directly from the above discussion, I think it would be fair to say that I now have something akin to a sexual fetish for dildos, and I couldn't care less if anyone thinks this is an unhealthy development. I simply love them - I love looking at them, stroking them, licking them, sucking them, and of course screwing myself with them. I experience very intense orgasms when using such rubber lovers, especially the ones with prominent raised veins which send me wild when the ridges slide against my clit. And I'm not the only one who gets off on it all either. Almost without exception men enjoy seeing me being penetrated by such awesome dicks, and I like filming scenes where I'm both doing the business myself or where I'm helplessly bondaged as my lovers take turns to 'punish' me with an oversized rubber cock (don't worry, I'm not stupid, and things are kept well within sensible limits, both with girth and penetration).
My only regret is that the makers of these toys feel the need to proportionately match girth to length, so dildos of twelve inches or more are often too large for actual penetration, something I find extremely frustrating. To satisfy my fantasies I want to play with cocks of up to twenty inches in length, but I also want to be able to put the head in my mouth and my pussy. I can take a rubber prick with a seven-and-a-half inch girth, but it's not something I'm able to do without considerable preparation and so I confine such games to special video shoots.
The fact that I like to use large dildos on myself and clearly fantasise about them so much prompted one reader to ask whether I was consciously trying to take myself out of play for 'normal' guys. This had never really occurred to me before, but thinking about it I would have to say that there's more than an element of truth in it. I really enjoy the fact that so few men are now able to sexually satisfy me with conventional vaginal sex, and there is a corresponding bonus in that those men who are capable of giving me vaginal pleasure soon get to realise how special and unique they are. This serves to reinforce their feelings of superiority over other males, and in particular it's almost impossible for them to hide their contempt for sexually weak men such as my husband. I love to see such stallion-like confidence in a man, at least one I'm about to be fucked by.
Spurred Into Action
As part of a quite lengthy email one reader said:
I find it hard to believe you would actually use spurs on someone - surely there's a real risk of injury?
I can only think the correspondent was assuming I wear Western-style spurs with a rowel, which I agree might be unwise. I use English spurs which have a metal shank with no wheel. In addition mine have smooth, rounded ends to avoid any problems from sharp edges. I don't use them particularly harshly - just enough to offer extra encouragement when a man is licking my pussy, and I think they add that extra something on video. Also they serve as an extra focus of worship. As well as sucking and licking my heels, I make my submissives do the same to my spurs as I whip them.
Riding has very strong associations with erotica, and I've always enjoyed my riding fantasies. I used to ride when I was a girl, but I stopped when I went to university. I kept my jumping saddle though, and this came back into use last year when Matt found out I owned one. We now mount it on a solid, secure stand, and there are so many kinky games that can be played with it. We strap cocks to it and I then go for a dildo ride while my boyfriend watches. At other times I ride in a really short stirrup with a buzzing clit stimulator strapped to my pussy, and I'll rise right out of the saddle like a jockey as Matt aggressively massages the stimulator against me, spanking me to orgasm in the process.
Best of all though is when Matt sits in the saddle and I mount his cock while facing him. I hold on to his shoulders and put my feet into the stirrups, and we have a fantastic fuck as I lift myself up and down on his awesome prick. Once he's ejaculated into me he gets off the saddle and I lower myself down on it, rubbing my pussy all over it while I'm still leaking cum. I'm sure I don't need to spell out what my husband is later required to do before he polishes the leather to its former glory.
What, you want some pictures of that? Maybe next time. I think I've shown enough for today.
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